Sunday, July 1, 2012

Jail House Blues

 If you recall, I spoke about the canines in my world. Canine means dog, feline means cat. Gramma told me so. I have so much to learn! The canine in the picture is Wall-E. Gramma calls him Wall-E, the wonder dog. According to Gramma, Wall-E is very smart and sensitive. I don't see it, though.

He does not seem to like me at all. Everytime he is near me, he turns his back to me. Not very polite or sensitive, if you ask me. Not smart, either. With his back to me, he does not see when I am about to attack!

He barks at me whenever I sneak past Gramma legs and into the house. Gramma has spoken to him about his annoying bark (her words), but he will not stop until she picks me up and takes me back to her office.

Toni Louise, on the other hand, enjoys my company. Gramma says that Toni Louise is dumb as a door. I don't know about that. She seems pretty smart to me. We like to wrestle around on the floor and she will nip me good if I get too rough. She likes to lick my face clean. I like her fur, it reminds me of my mom cat. Toni will let me snuggle against her neck, too.

Oscar likes to play with me, but only in small doses. He will play for awhile, then growl to let me know we are done. If I try to play more or snuggle with him he will put my whole head in his mouth and take me to the door of Gramma's office and deposit me there. I don't mind his method of moving me so much as I mind his breath! It is really bad! Gramma even notices it when she picks me up.

She will say, "Oh, Martha, has Oscar been licking you?" Licking me? Is she paying attention? She has explained to me that Oscar is an old guy and that old guys have nasty breath. Maybe he should have some dental work done.

My breath is sweet and clean. Gramma says so, she also says I have very sharp teeth. Those sharp teeth get me in trouble, too. I like to sink my teeth into Gramma's heels. I don't advise doing this. She will scoop you up before you know and put you in the kennel! And lock the door!

The kennel used to be my safe place. Gramma had soft towels and toys in it for me, but one day I bit her hand pretty hard and she took all the nice stuff out of my kennel and made me stay in it for a very long time. I fell asleep. When I heard her open my door, I refused to come out. She got down low and stuck her face in the door and asked me if I had thought about what I had done. (No, I didn't, I slept.). When I would not come out, she told me to have it my way, but that I would be spending lots of time in jail if I did not change my ways. I did not believe her.

Maybe I should have listened, because I was back in the kennel that very same day! A little girl tried to pick me up, so I grabbed her arm with my claws and bit her. Gramma thumped me on my head and put me in my kennel. I did not sleep this time. This time I climbed on the door and made strangled mewling sounds. Papa came in and scolded Gramma for leaving in the kennel and let me loose. He told Gramma that she was being cruel. She told him to talk to her after I bit him. He said that I was "just a tiny kitten" and "how bad can it hurt?".

So, I bit him. I guess it must have hurt pretty bad, cause he dumped me in jail again. Since then I have come to know every inch of my prison. Not only that, I hear Wall-E whispering about me. He says that the kennel belongs to him. He says that his boy gave it to him and that Gramma should never have let me use it. Until now. He likes the fact that I am being punished in it and says that he is happy to provide the use of his kennel for that very purpose. I do not think we will ever be friends, do you?

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